look on .

i will show you , and prove you wrong .

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WORDPRESS! (:

i’m back from the E6 chalet , and it was tiring ! 😀 lemme start off with

day 1 .

met up with the class at interchange and bused to pasir ris interchange to change bus . i was shocked to see howie , ivy and yuqian there . they told me they were’nt going . eeeyer . cheat my feelings ! reached interchange then changed bus and went to downtown . wait for marcus and his mum to help us check in . after that brandon came over , with haziq . went for dinner before shopping for bbq stuffs . went back , bathed and ton the whole night .

he was suppose to come find me , but he didnt .

day 2 .

slept for awhile before waking up and deciding what we should do on that day . ended up going to ntuc with banana to buy some more stuffs and lunch was sushi 😀 ate and went to shower again .__. idk why i like to shower so much :O thn prepared for the bbq , and thank god it didnt rain ! bbq and went to buy ice cream with banana 😀 she’s awesome ! thn went back and they added vodka into my milo D: i had rashes and went to sleep . woke up around 10 plus and slept around 12 (:

i was suppose to borrow toothpaste from z .

day 3 .

woke up round 9 and went to shower , then had to check out before 1030 but we were slightly lateeeee ._. went for brunch and headed back to yishun ~ walked around and went home .

TOOOOOOOTHPASTE , i like you ._______.

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how come ?

give me reason , why you dont like me .

tell me , what did i even do to you , huh .

irritate you on facebook ? no ; irritate you in real life ? no ; talk to you ? no .

i dont even talk to you much , much less irritate you . seriously , whats wrong with you . you’ve been listening to people say bad things about me , that you rather believe ? oh , maybe , since yall are a family . whats your fucking problem with me . why not just tell me .

seriously , not like i am acquainted with the whole big bunch of you . maybe most ? what kind of a person am i to you ? some irritating and noisy person ? LET ME TELL YOU , I’M FAR FROM THAT . yea , i may be noisy or loud , but i am not irritating . neither am i shameless / thickskinned enough to stick with you guys , hang out with you guys , or even do anything .

ya , you have the right to dislike me . but at least , you should have a reason for that .

lemme tell you , i have nothing against you guys . out of the whole bunch of you , i’ve on felt guilty towards ash . and whats more , i think , let me repeat , i think , i have treated chuanzhi like my best friend ever . BEST FRIEND , not best fake friend . i dont know if he said anything about me being irritating or anything , but even if i am , have i irritated you ? no , i didnt .

if you’re going to say i did , when ? how ? by not talking / interacting with you people ?

i’ve had enough . enough of all your nonsense , and all your fakeness .

FUCKFAKEFRIENDS .

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why you believe me ?

cant you tell that i am lying when i said i was kidding ?

cant you tell that i dont miss you ?

you miss the kids more than me , you miss everyone more than you will ever miss me . why wont you just stop , pause and think of me . now , i’m really not sure if i like you still . i hope i dont . i dont need you to like me back , i just need you to stop , and think of me . think of us . 😦

—————————————————————–

i think i need someone i can rely on . someone who will protect me from people .

the people around me are making me scared . they are making me hate myself , bringing down my confidence . i realise i’ve changed , i am different from before . yes , everyone changes . but i dont wanna have low self-esteem . i am afraid that i will hurt myself . i dont want to hurt myself .

i’m not fat  . i’m not round . i’m not short . i’m perfect the way i am .

really ?

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D:

i know , i was really blunt that night . i’m sorry ok . please be my friend again , please talk to me . ):

khoo ,

i dont wanna see you like this . i miss you 😦 i want you to be happy , i want to see you smile . do you know how much i miss you , how i much i miss , hugging you .

its been so long since i last hugged you , whatsmore , kiss you ):

i had that wildest thought .

” we could go to either one of our houses , we’ll play together on the sofa . thn some how or another , we will look at each other in the eye , and you know . “

i dont want you to be replaced by anybody . you hold a very special place in my heart . but i want you to know , i’m always here for you , even if the whole world leaves you .

sam , i’m here . i never left at all . please , come back :/

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(‘:

i’ve to stop that , seriously .

i told you this before , dont wait till its too late . i may not be there anymore ):

i dont want that day to come . seriously . )’:

i just haven found it . yet .

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):

was what i said really too much ? i guess i sort of went overboard with what i said ): i’m sorry .

i really really want to be your friend , be your girlfriend ):

i love you , i dont like him .

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